A few short months ago we were counting down to the new year, excited about what it would bring. Then came the Pandemic. I want to share my struggles over the last five months and how I’ve worked through things. Then I have a few announcements to share with you about some things I’m working on.
The past months have been the most difficult of my life. In February, my son was diagnosed with anxiety. In March, my husband was rushed to the hospital with chest pain. Then came the Pandemic, a fall-out with a good friend and the passing of my father on May 4th. Needless to say, I am emotionally exhausted. I’m not telling you this to garner pity, but to show you how I’m working through my difficulties and planning a better second half of 2020. Here are five ways you can write through your grief and come out stronger.
- Write for yourself first.
When you are trying to make a career out of writing and selling books, you usually spend some time researching popular tropes in order to write to market. When you are grieving a loss of any kind, or just in a depressed mood due to circumstances that all goes out the window. Don’t worry about your work in progress. Throw deadlines out the window. Allow yourself time to put your current feelings into words. Maybe it will result in a new story idea, but more than likely it will be something for yourself, meant to sort out your feelings and start to heal.
2. Write in one session.
Get all your thoughts and feelings on the page. Don’t analyze them and don’t worry about how it sounds, sentence structure or grammar. Remember, this is for you. Before you can return to writing this time to word vomit your emotions on the page is essential. It will clear your head and give you time to process the feelings that you haven’t released. Be free from self-criticism and just get those feelings down.
3. Let it Out.
It’s okay to cry when you’re writing. Leave all your emotions on the page, including your tears if you need to. Don’t hold back. Even if your thoughts and words aren’t logical, write them. You are processing deep emotions. If you hold back you won’t deal with your loss and will still have feelings to process. So let it out, it’s okay.
4. Sort through conflicted emotions.
Write everything you want the person or situation you’re grieving to know. Apologize, express regret, move through all your feelings and let out the suppressed thoughts you’re carrying. Use this time to understand yourself better and what you want to bring forward into your life. What do you want to change? How do you want to move forward?
5. Start a New Chapter.
Use what you learn from the grieving process to take your life in a new direction. What can learn from this? How can it help your writing? How can it help your self-awareness? This is a growth experience. Embrace it and apply it to your life. And most importantly, don’t stop writing. Grief strikes us all but writing can help us move past it and come out the other side stronger, wiser and more determined. You can do this!
A new short story, Love Isn’t Enough, will be sent out in June’s Newsletter for subscribers. It features a story about Kathy Brooks and Richard Grant, Michael and Madeline’s parents, before they were married.
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